leadership

You shouldn’t be leading anyone until you’ve learned these 9 leadership lessons:

1. Don’t criticize, condemn, or complain.

People rarely criticize themselves.

So you shouldn’t criticize them either.

Criticizing someone will:

– Hurt their pride
– Demoralize them
– Amplify the problem
– Put them on the defensive
– Make them resentful of you

Anyone can criticize.

It takes a powerful person to understand.

Instead of criticizing them, try to understand them.

This fosters sympathy, tolerance, and kindness between you.

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Starting from a positive perspective also makes people more receptive to constructive criticism.

2. Being interested in people makes them like you.

The easiest way to create relationships:

Be interested in other people instead of trying to make other people interested in you.

People are mainly interested in themselves.

When you show interest, you make them feel good.

Next time you have a conversation:

Try to learn something new about the other person.

If they mention something in passing, ask them to expand on it.

For example:

If they mention an interest in psychology, ask them what got them interested in it.

3. Be a good listener.

This relates to the previous tip.

Encourage others to talk about themselves.

Being a good listener shows you’re interested in the other person.

You can be an attentive listener by:

– Asking questions people enjoy answering
– Encouraging people to talk about themselves
– Learn about people’s goals and achievements

Also…

Pay attention while listening.

People unconsciously know when you’re not paying attention.

4. To win someone to your side, get them to say “yes” immediately.

When you’re in a debate, don’t start off by focusing on the things you disagree on.

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Instead, start off by finding common ground and emphasizing the things you agree on.

We’re unconsciously motivated to stay consistent with what we say.

If we start off with a “no,” then we’ll have a hard time shifting to a “yes.”

The more “yes”es you can get as you begin your discussion, the more likely you’ll be to get a positive response to your main idea.

5. Ask questions instead of giving orders.

People don’t like to be told what to do.

Ask questions or make suggestions.

For example, you can ask:

“Are you sure this will work?”

A question like this encourages creativity and cooperation.

It also gives people a chance to think for themselves.

Don’t forcefully tell people what to do.

Ask them questions that will make them want to do what you want them to do.

People don’t like to be told what to do… but they don’t mind being led.

6. Show respect for the other person.

People also don’t like to be told they’re wrong.

It attacks their judgment, intelligence, and self-respect.

Victims of such an attack won’t want to agree with you – they’ll want to attack you back.

Try admitting you’re the one who might be wrong.

There’s power in the statement:

“I may be wrong, and if I am, I’d like to be corrected, so…”

People will never say no to this phrase.

It’ll inspire the other person to be as fair and open-minded as you.

7. Every time you’re wrong, admit it.

Acknowledge your mistakes and admit them before anyone else gets the chance to.

Why?

– It’s easier than defending yourself
– A forgiving attitude will be taken by others
– Your errors will be minimized

You’ll also feel relief when you admit your mistakes.

It eliminates any feeling of guilt, defensiveness, and egotism.

It also helps fix the problems caused by your mistake.

It encourages cooperation instead of combat.

8. Use encouragement to empower the other person.

Telling someone they’re lazy, stupid, or unskilled will:

– Attack their ego
– Disempower them
– Destroy any incentive they have to improve

This won’t lead to the outcome you want.

Encouraging someone motivates them to improve.

Try setting up small wins they can aim for.

This will give them guidance, direction, and inspiration.

It’ll help them see their progress.

This will also increase their motivation.

9. Talk in terms of the other person’s interest.

Make them feel happy about doing the thing you suggest.

People are more likely to cooperate if you can show them the benefits of cooperating.

Here’s how to do so:

You shouldn’t be leading anyone until you’ve learned these 9 leadership lessons:

1. Don’t criticize
2. Be interested
3. Listen
4. Get them saying “yes”
5. Ask more questions than giving orders
6. Show respect
7. Admit when you’re wrong
8. Encourage others
9. Align incentives

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Thanks for reading.

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